Again and Again and Again
As much as I hate to say it... i hate it.
Why is does it always happen. Why do I always feel this way. Why cant I just learn to accept to know when to stop. But all i can do is to hold it in because thats the best thing to do for situations like this. whatever f m life.
All I can do is to act like nothing is wrong and in due time ill grow use to it and then my whole life will be whatevers. I am tired of this. I am tired of everything.
whatever.
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
I Cant Believe It..
Remember those good old days when life just seemed so worry free.
19 years pass and now I sit here worry about whats next whats next. Time to finish that paper. time to study for that test. And besides that life is filled with drama after High School, my goodness I thought that was only a phase that leaves you after you get your HS diploma, but I guess it follows you until you die... LoL whatever.
To be honest. I have been with many girls in my life about 8 9 10 or so. But then it could be less because people say some dont count, but hey whatever. Though all these girls were special at the time. There is one that i truly adore. Who would have thought such an Angel could possible exist. Someone who is so sweet, kind, understanding, beautiful, funny, trust worthy, squishy, amazing, caring... and so on. Never would have believed I would find such a beauty.
These past 4 months and 27 days I have never felt so happy. Even with the drama happening in my life, This girl is like that frosting on top of your cake. The only thing that makes you bring out the best in yourself. That motivation to go for the goal. That smile you have when you get your first toy. What a feeling. She is the core of my world. What more can I ask for. Intense.
19 years pass and now I sit here worry about whats next whats next. Time to finish that paper. time to study for that test. And besides that life is filled with drama after High School, my goodness I thought that was only a phase that leaves you after you get your HS diploma, but I guess it follows you until you die... LoL whatever.
To be honest. I have been with many girls in my life about 8 9 10 or so. But then it could be less because people say some dont count, but hey whatever. Though all these girls were special at the time. There is one that i truly adore. Who would have thought such an Angel could possible exist. Someone who is so sweet, kind, understanding, beautiful, funny, trust worthy, squishy, amazing, caring... and so on. Never would have believed I would find such a beauty.
These past 4 months and 27 days I have never felt so happy. Even with the drama happening in my life, This girl is like that frosting on top of your cake. The only thing that makes you bring out the best in yourself. That motivation to go for the goal. That smile you have when you get your first toy. What a feeling. She is the core of my world. What more can I ask for. Intense.
Why ???
A feeling I thought that would disappear after a period of time. A dreadful feeling I thought I would never have to deal with again, but unfortunately it came back. Oh dam you!!!
Every time its brought up I cant help but feel agitated by it. I know I should get over it. But sadly its quite difficult when your afraid of the mysteries that lie in the future.
"How Did We End Up Here" by B44 what a song... sometimes I wonder if feelings do run in circles and it just takes time for them to come back, like how it takes the world 365 days to make one whole circle around the sun.
Sometimes I wish life would be simple like algebra. Wishing things would make sense...and wishing life would not have to be so dam dramatic, but i guess with out that life is boring...but who cares. As long as things make sense its what makes it less stressful.
FMLife.
Every time its brought up I cant help but feel agitated by it. I know I should get over it. But sadly its quite difficult when your afraid of the mysteries that lie in the future.
"How Did We End Up Here" by B44 what a song... sometimes I wonder if feelings do run in circles and it just takes time for them to come back, like how it takes the world 365 days to make one whole circle around the sun.
Sometimes I wish life would be simple like algebra. Wishing things would make sense...and wishing life would not have to be so dam dramatic, but i guess with out that life is boring...but who cares. As long as things make sense its what makes it less stressful.
FMLife.
Saturday, September 5, 2009
Never Ending Talk
Drama is what you see online or on television. What is it doing in my life? I do not remember reading a script being directed to act a certain way? What is this?
Graduating high school, I was hoping to be rid of this nonsense. I guess trying to meet more mature people has its downside. They may seem mature for the first few days, but after a while they seem to turn there backs on you and start to talk shit. How mature?
I admit I was an asshole back in the days, but that was a year or two ago. And to hate me because of what people tell you, good job. If you want to hate me, at least know me.
Grow Up.
Graduating high school, I was hoping to be rid of this nonsense. I guess trying to meet more mature people has its downside. They may seem mature for the first few days, but after a while they seem to turn there backs on you and start to talk shit. How mature?
I admit I was an asshole back in the days, but that was a year or two ago. And to hate me because of what people tell you, good job. If you want to hate me, at least know me.
Grow Up.
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